Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Crapfest


Today I brought our foster daughter to her social worker's office and said goodbye. She's going to live with her aunt.  I think she'll be okay but it's sad to say goodbye to someone you got to know and nurtured and loved, even for a brief time. Maxwell's friend Nicky was supposed to come over and play with Maxwell after school, but they had to cancel.  I knew Max was going to be really upset when he got off the bus. He definitely was.  The first thing he said to me was "So when is Nicky getting here????".  That was not fun news to break. I was also supposed to go mentor today but a wrench got thrown in that one too. Then the woman who is in charge of matching foster kids with families came over.  She wanted to see the whole house (didn't know that...) and when she went upstairs to the disasters which are the kids' rooms she said, "oh my...". That was really nice to hear. Since it was 60 degrees out, I took the kids for a bike ride downtown to try to cheer up Maxwell, myself, and get us all some fresh air.  It started out very nicely until Maxwell decided to ride his bike through this gigantic flooded parking lot. I told them both not to go in the water. Did they listen? No. Of course not. We've had some big listening problems lately, so of course they rode their bikes straight through it.  The water was about a foot deep at the other end of the lot and their shoes were saturated, along with their socks and their pants up to the knee.  Max claims he didn't hear me (baloney) and later recanted and said maybe he heard me "a little bit".  Mimi says she was just trying to follow the example of her older brother. Yes, she actually said that. Nice try, Mimi.  I was SO mad at them.  I really needed that walk and so did they.  They are upstairs in their rooms with the doors closed for the next half an hour after a very stern lecture about listening, fibbing, and brattiness. I know most bloggers and facebookers and the like show only the best of life, but not me. I'm telling it like it is: Today was horrible.  Here's a picture of the crime in action.



Monday, January 30, 2012

These are cool pictures.









He'll plumb his way into your heart.


Today I had the absolute pleasure of meeting the happiest plumber in America.  I would definately recommend this guy if you have any plumbing problem, big or small, or need a godfather for your kid.  He was like Burt from Mary Poppins only heftier. If you live in the valley, get in touch and I'll give you his #.  Also, We found THIS after Max had gotten on the bus.  I guess Max just wanted the plumber to know whose office it really was.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Some things that are going down around here.

* Ate dinner at a friend's house tonight for the first time.  Their house was so big that I literally lost one of my children in it for about 10 minutes.  Dinner was very yummy.
* Some Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on our door yesterday with a copy of a magazine entitled "ARMAGEDDON!". I wonder if that is the best way to share the good news. 
* I canceled tomorrow's family night for the Eggs since it will be our foster daughter's last day with us.  So bummed out, I can't even explain it.
* Went to church and listened to a really good lesson.  I'll have to write about it in my journal tonight. 
* A plumber is coming over tomorrow b/c the water that runs into the tub is not getting hot. 
*  I am totally off my paxil now and I couldn't be happier about it.  I haven't had withdrawal symptoms in weeks.  I cannot tell you how much of a relief this is. 
* Chris found a large Peso note in an old drawer and looked up the conversion rate.  It seems we hit the Mexican lottery: $1500. Can that be right??? We have no idea where it came from. 

Pictures from my favorite movies (I don't really have too too many honestly):







a VACATION from my PROBLEMS! 

Let's talk about God at 1 A.M.



Do you ever have those nights where you can't sleep and it's too cold to go outside on your porch and watch for UFOs so instead you go up to the top of your blog and click on that nice little "next blog" thing?  I am having one of those nights.  And I am reminiscing about one of the best random blogs I ever found that way. I think it was called something like "I want to kill my neighbors" or "my neighbors must die" or something like that. It was an entire blog dedicated to this chick and her obnoxious next door neighbors, how they would crank up Buddhist chanting at all hours and hang prayer flags all over the universe and be totally obnoxious and rude to her and her boyfriend. It was absolutely hilarious. But to show you that I really love Buddhists and Buddha and the like, it's just that this particular blog was a riot, I give you the above picture to enjoy.

Since we're speaking so seriously about Eastern religion and I am so very well schooled in such topics, let's chat about another one: Hinduism. Here's the pic:



This is Bhagavan Das and I spent two weeks respectively with him at two chanting retreats.  He taught me lots and lots of Hindu chanting and the very first time I met him we did "Jai Ram, Jai Ram, Jai Jai, Rama" for probably two hours and it was the one and only time that I ever achieved enlightened meditation. I've been trying to re-achieve it ever since to no avail.  On the last retreat, I had a 2-hour-long private audience with him and he gave me a reading. It was way far out.  He wanted to know why I was a Mormon and he was really concerned that it was going to cramp my style (the time before that I wasn't a Mormon yet...) because I so enjoyed the intoxicated lifestyle that he also enjoys.  He also told me to hold off on having babies because I was going to come into a lot of $$$ if I managed to wait on that. I didn't listen and immediately got pregnant and subsequently we're pretty broke.  He's a cool guy, he's like 7 ft. tall and he also taught me the Hare Krishna chant which is like the most relaxing and centering chant you can chant. I also blasted Bhagavan Das's music in my car the whole ride up to the Mormon church the first time I went there to meet the missionaries b/c it relaxes me and b/c I had no idea what to expect and I was a little nervous.  So thanks for being there, Baba :)


Now at age 32, I'd say this guy is more my speed when it comes to spiritual gurus:

:
This is my very favorite elder in our church.  Are we supposed to have favorites?  Well, he's the one who really gets through to me on a personal and spiritual level.  President Uchtdorf is a very inspired member of the general presidency and it seems like every single talk and address he gives is meant for me.  His talks have really helped me through some very tough times.  I just love this man as if I knew him personally. 
He's from Germany.  He's a pilot. He's just a really amazing guy.

Since this is my blog and I can say whatever I want to here and you can just totally ignore it all you want or whatever, I will say that I always wanted to know God.  I tried to get to know him in lots of different ways, some funkier than others.  I remember praying in my room when I was like 7 and asking God to let me get to know him in big ways.  We didn't really talk about God too much growing up (we were Catholic but it was only a once a week in the morning thing really), and I also remember one time when I wanted to practice praying the rosary but I was afraid my fam would think I was weird, so I put them in a little purse and told my mom I was going to take a walk around the block.  She started grilling me about why I needed to take my little purse with me, and I got mad and yelled at her and went upstairs, never divulging what was in my purse.  I could just imagine what she thought was stashed in there.
But I really really did find my way, and when we find our way we're supposed to share it up. This is totally uncomfortable for me to do b/c most people think I'm some kind of weirdo. But truly I'm not. At least not about this.  And I'm as sure as a person at my stage of the game can be: this church is the real deal. I know when you hear about the Mormon church it sounds kind of out there.  I totally get that.  But if you hang on for just one more minute you will probably be really surprised, in a good way.  The smartest and most down to earth people I know are Mormons.  And a Mormon invented TV and a Mormon found Saddam Hussein hiding in that hole in the desert.   Thanks, my brethren!

Here are some things that people think are true about Mormons but aren't and really bug me when people believe them:

-We worship Joseph Smith. Not so. He was our founding prophet and opened the last dispensation (he did what? ask me and I'll tell you more).
-Men can have lots of wives. Not so. If you even try that you get x-ed. But at one time in our church history some brethren were asked to take multiple wives. We as a church understand why this was so and we're not ashamed of it. It's not our dirty little secret.  There was a reason and we respect it.
-You can get kicked out of the church by excommunication and you're damned to hell.  No way.  You can get excommunicated in our church, and you can probably get x-ed in your church too.  There are steps you can take to regain your standing in the church. An x is only forever if you want it to be.
-We hate gay people. So not true. I love gay people. God loves gay people. We all love gay people. Please stop thinking we have any beef with gay people.
-We have to give 10% of our income to the church.  We don't have to give anything. You can never give a cent and you can come every week and eat all you want at our potlucks.  My husband and I do choose to give our 10%, but no one is breathing down our necks about it.  We do it b/c we believe in the law of tithing.
-We are all going to vote for Mit Romney. Oh no, so sorry, not the case. Though my mom would be happy if that one was true...

Have a great Sunday wherever you are!

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Sew not working.




Sew, today I went to town moving a bookcase and a really heavy toy box so I could set up this adorable little sewing corner in my living room.  I planned on sewing little patchwork squares while listening to District Attorney Jack McCoy do his thing in the background. When the kids were all tucked in and asleep (after some serious wrangling), Chris asked me if I wanted help setting up my sewing machine so I could "sew my troubles away" (he's so cute!).  But guess what!  Everything was cool until we hit this kind of serious glitch called the foot peddle doesn't stop when you take your foot off!!!  What??? Come on, machine, are you serious???  Here's Chris trying to figure it out with the manual, but of course all the manual says is "step on the peddle to start sewing and take your foot off to stop".  I guess I'm back to menial labor for tonight.  So bummed.  Has anyone ever encountered this ridiculous problem before?  HELP!

Japan, here we come!

I've been on a mission to make Chris see that he needs to take us all to Japan.  If these don't motivate him, I'm kind of at a loss as to what my next move should be.




{this moment}

...one day late.  So you get 2 :)




I know it seems like I take more pics of Mimi than Max. That's b/c I do. Max is not always a willing subject, and Mimi loves to pose!  I'm going to try to get some good shots of Max this week :)

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

We love shmatas!

Guess who made these awesome shmatas....



PA!



You may read my blog...

...but you do not know me.

Some things about me that you don't know, finally revealed!

1. I have never seen The Sound of Music.
2. I am so not feeling this season of Jersey Shore.
3. I regularly check to see how much flight&hotel packages to Japan cost on Travelocity and Orbitz.
4. I am Team Jacob all the way (Come on, ladies, really.  A pale, whiny guy with no heartbeat or a buff dude who changes into a massive wolf?  This should be a no-brainer).
5. My fantasy is to stop time and read book after book after book while it snows outside.
6. I totes love the chance to give the house a really good cleaning.
7. I think that the funniest person I ever met is me.
8. Well actually I think my daughter is the funniest person I ever met, but she gets it all from me.
9. I will be so bummed out when McDonald's stops selling those limited time Big Mac snack wraps. 
10.  The only jewelry I can wear is small earrings.  Everything else drives me crazy, even my wedding ring.
11. One of the best days of my life was when Chris and I were in San Fransisco, I was preg with Max, and we spent the whole day walking around the Japanese Tea Garden and the Botanical Garden. 
12.  I truly do think that Mormons have the real scoop.
13.  I've never needed any sort of dental work.
14.  I collect wheat pennies and drummer boy quarters. 
15.  I knew Max was a boy and Mimi was a girl before the doctors did.
16.  I'll never not have a dog, probably two.
17.  The number 208 has special significance to me.
18.  I'm always shocked when I see a picture of myself and I don't look like Heidi Klum.
19.  I have a bachelor's degree in English but I'm so not down with Shakespeare.  Serious snooze-fest.
20.  I'm a total insomniac.

What's your list????

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Trying my best here...





We were recently given our first foster placement.  Max and Mimi have gotten a crash course in two-year-old psychology & behavior.  I have gotten a crash course on the adult side...

Not-so-helpful comments & questions we've received, directed to me unless otherwise noted (I swear these are all real comments. really.):

1. OMG how will you ever give her up/ part with her/ let her go back to those people?
2.  So, can you tell me what happened to her? 
3. (to her or our other children) How do you like your brand new sister/brother/mommy/family, honey?
4. OMG she's soooooooooooo gorgeous! (only obnoxious when they act like the two other children standing next to her are invisible and have no feelings). 
5. (to her) Oh you poor little thing! Too bad you can't stay with your new mommy forever! (yes, this really was an actual comment).
6.  You're lucky you got a good one. 

Comments and questions we have welcomed happily:

1.  (to her)What a great family you get to visit!
2.  (to our kids) Is it fun having a new friend staying at your house?
3.  What cuties you have!
4.  I've been thinking about doing that myself. Can I ask you a few questions about it?
5.  I think that's a great thing to do.  Let me know how I can give you a hand (and she really meant it and she did).
6. She'll always be better off for being with you for this short time because she'll forever have your prayers :)

If you are a question/comment offender yourself, no worries, it's a delicate situation for sure.  Just please learn from the list :)  If you don't know why your comment falls under the not-so-helpful list, I'd be happy to help you out, leave a comment or e-mail.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Mama Like!


Finally living in the most expensive continental state in the nation pays off!




I love a big snowstorm on a Saturday, It means Pa is snowed in with us!!!! Everyone just came back in and Pa is making chocolate chip pancakes :) 

Movie of my life


Due to the onslaught of views to this blog, a movie is being made of my life.  Here is the casting thus far:
Playing the role of Lisa Eggers, Heidi Klum (I'm the one doing the casting).


Playing husband Christopher (again, it's my movie).

Best friend Danna


 Best friend Jenny


Best friend Megan

 Dear Aunt Mary (sorry Mare, but Charlize was unwilling to go brunette for the role).


 Playing Phil


Playing the part of Mom, AKA Family Night Gramma


Playing the role of JP, pending mastery of French Canadian Accent.

 The part of Dad played by himself.



Brother Mark.


Brother Mark alternate


Gianna as herself, natch.

Young Maxwell Arthur


 Playing the grown-up Mimi (it's told from her point of view looking back on her charmed life).

More castings to come!